It was a dark and stormy night …. when I was overcome with the urge to try a homemade hair mask (read: I’m spending too much time on Pinterest). I had all the ingredients in my kitchen (a rare blessing for me) which included an egg (yolk only – who wants those pesky whites in their hair?) vodka, olive oil (‘ONLY USE EXTRA VIRGIN’ – obviously) and honey. There may have been baking soda in there too; I’d had some wine by this point.
I made up my little concoction in a rush, hoping Brendon wouldn’t come into the kitchen and ask me what on Earth I was making. My dog looked at me like I had gone mad, whisking up a little bowl of vodka-honey-egg-surprise.
After googling whether wet or dry hair is the most appropriate for a hair mask, (it’s dry, for ‘best results’) I set to work. I started by scooping out some of the (very runny) mixture with my hands onto my head. Most of it ran down my arms. Hmm. I tried a second tactic – pouring it into my hand and then plopping it on my hair, before finally just dipping my ends straight in the bowl. I lifted the bowl to pour the rest over my roots when the very slippery honey-egg-oil coated bowl flew out of my hands and down onto the tiled floor. There went another dessert bowl. Oops. It’s at this point I found myself standing, frozen, wrapped in a towel with egg literally on my face, waiting for Brendon to burst in and see if I’m ok. He didn’t. (Thanks, buddy! I’m fine!)
Saved this humiliation of explaining ‘it’s for my hair’, I pinned up my (at this point quite sticky and foul) hair and set about waiting for the recommended 40 minutes. After about 20 I got bored sniffing vodka and feeling egg dry on my scalp and hopped in the shower. The warm water makes the eggs go all gooey, so be warned it’s fairly unpleasant. After it was all washed and rinsed out, I dried my hair and awaited the glorious rewards of my labour.
It looked mostly the same. Maybe a wee bit shinier? Bouncier? Maybe that’s just me hoping I didn’t waste vodka, my time AND a dessert bowl on a fruitless exercise.
So while I did keep myself busy for a rainy evening… My official beauty recommendation is DON’T DO THIS.